03 oktoober, 2011

Charlie Croker – Tõlkes kaduma läinud (2009)

Kõiksugu inglise keele apsakaid laiast turismimaailmast.

Zürich, Šveits:
We have nice bath and are very good in bed. (lk 12)

Berliini hotelli riietusruumis:
Please hang yourself here. (lk 14)

Guests are requested not to smoke or do other disgusting behaviours in bed. (lk 17)

Taipei, Taiwan:
If there is anything we can do to assist and help you, please do not contact us. (lk 17)

You are invited to take advantage of the chambermaid. (lk 24)

Firenze, Itaalia:
Fire! It is what we can be doing, we hope. No fear. Not ourselves. Say quickly to all people coming up down, everywhere, a prayer is a clerk. He is assured of safety by expert men who are in the bar for telephone for the fighters of the fire come out. (lk 26)

Jaapani taksos:
Safety first.
Please put on your seatbelt.
Prepare for accident. (lk 33)

Taiwani šampoonipudelil:
Use repeatedly for severe damage. (lk 39)

Mr Zheng and his fellow workers like to meet you and entertain you hostility and unique cooking technique. (lk 47)

Hiina, kirjeldatakse pannkoogirooga:
Waiter will roll in front of you. (lk 48)

Pildiallkiri Nõukogude Liidus tantsupeo pildi all:
Young men's balls in full swing. (lk 55)

Indoneesia reisibrošüür:
If we are lucky we will see duck boys home, men massaging their cocks on the road, cow boys taking grass. Yes it is a wonderful experience. (lk 63)

Iisraeli lihapoes:
I slaughter myself twice daily. (lk 71)

Poesilt Lovina rannal Balil, Indoneesias:
Feel like shopping?
We have no good things to sell. (lk 71)

Pesumaja Roomas:
Ladies, leave your clothes here and spend the afternoon having a good time. (lk 72)

Jaapani poeaken:
We wish you are Merry Christmas. (lk 74)

Jaapani kokakoola purgil:
I feel Coke & sound special. (lk 79)

Jaapani toidupakend:
This cute mild curry uses 100% Japanese apple and cheerful hamster. (lk 79)

Templis Bangkokis, Tais:
It is forbidden to enter a woman even a foreigner if dressed as a man. (lk 84)

Sõnum Interneti tutvumisportaalis tai naiselt potentsiaalsele partnerile:
I started go aerobic dance, because I am fat. I think, when you come Thailand, you want to see me on slim body! (lk 91)

Venelanna tutvumiskuulutus:
I am looking for an realy educated man who can be joke to himself. (lk 91)

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