Philip K. Dick "Exegesis" (2011)

See pole päris arvustus, vaid muljetamine ja nõuanne tulevasele potentsiaalsele lugejale. Hõlmates 900 lehekülge, püüab PKD mõtestada, mõista ja aru saada müstilisest kogemusest, mis tabab teda 1974. aastal. Nii pole tegu tema tavapärase/tavapäratu fiktsiooniga, vaid ühe tänapäeva huvitavaima religioosse/müstilise/filosoofilise/psühhoanalüütilise tekstimassiga, mis polnud avaldamiseks mõeldudki.
   Ja kuna see pole avaldamiseks mõeldud, siis pole see ka arvustamiseks mõeldud.



Dick started the journal after his visionary experiences in February and March 1974, which he called "2-3-74." These visions began shortly after Dick had impacted wisdom teeth removed. When a delivery person from the pharmacy brought his pain medication, he noticed the ichthys necklace she wore and asked her what it meant. She responded that it was a symbol used by the early Christians, and in that moment Dick's religious experiences began:


In that instant, as I stared at the gleaming fish sign and heard her words, I suddenly experienced what I later learned is called anamnesis—a Greek word meaning, literally, "loss of forgetfulness." I remembered who I was and where I was. In an instant, in the twinkling of an eye, it all came back to me. And not only could I remember it but I could see it. The girl was a secret Christian and so was I. We lived in fear of detection by the Romans. We had to communicate with cryptic signs. She had just told me all this, and it was true.

For a short time, as hard as this is to believe or explain, I saw fading into view the black, prisonlike contours of hateful Rome. But, of much more importance, I remembered Jesus, who had just recently been with us, and had gone temporarily away, and would very soon return. My emotion was one of joy. We were secretly preparing to welcome Him back. It would not be long. And the Romans did not know. They thought He was dead, forever dead. That was our great secret, our joyous knowledge. Despite all appearances, Christ was going to return, and our delight and anticipation were boundless.

In the following weeks, Dick experienced further visions, including a hallucinatory slideshow of abstract patterns and an information-rich beam of pink light. In the Exegesis, he theorized as to the origins and meaning of these experiences, frequently concluding that they were religious in nature. The being that originated the experiences is referred to by several names, including Zebra, God, and the Vast Active Living Intelligence System. From 1974 until his death in 1982, Dick wrote the Exegesis by hand in late-night writing sessions, sometimes composing as many as 150 pages in a sitting. In total, it consists of approximately 8,000 pages of notes, only a small portion of which have been published.

Besides the Exegesis, Dick described his visions and faith in numerous other works, including VALIS, Radio Free Albemuth, The Divine Invasion, The Transmigration of Timothy Archer, one brief passage in A Scanner Darkly, and the uncompleted The Owl in Daylight, as well as many essays and personal letters. In Pursuit of Valis: Selections From the Exegesis was published in 1991.

Ühest küljest on see dokument huvitav kindlasti PKD armastajatele, või psühholoogile, või filosoofidele. Mulle meeldis lõpuks lugeda vaid illmselt filosoofiadoktorandist toimetaja ääremärkuseid, kes kommenteerib PKD'i lõike, mõtteid või lähenemist.
   See raamat on iseenesest klassika, või moodne religioosne tekst. Inimene pöördub oma vabal tahtel (vist) tagasi reaalsuse otsingutele. Gnostitsism, reaalsus, Jumal - kõik saab pahupidi pööratud. PKD otsib meeleheitlikult seletust kogetule ja talletab kõik oma päevikulaadses kaustahunnikus. Siin on mees, kes kogeb ise midagi, mis on püha ja ületab reaalsuse ning lõpuks on tema otsing ju meie kõigi otsing. Ainult, et meid ei taba üldiselt müstilised kogemused nii kõva litriga.
   Ise lugesin seda lõikude kaupa ja otsisin lõpuks huvitavamaid märksõnu, kuna ka endal sarnaseid, kuid leigemaid juhtumeid olnud. Vahva ja hirmus, kui mõned ideed ja asjad temaga klappisid. Muide, ta mainib ka salapärast kirja Eestist, mille saab 70ndate keskel ja mille koheselt FBI'le edastab, olles tol ajal tohutult paranoiline ja kartis igasugu jälitamist. Ilmselt sellist tegelast jälitatigi.
   Aga jah, siin kohal ma ei püüagi arvustada arvustamatut, vaid allun irratsionaalsusele ja kõikehõlmavale salapärale.